For example a staff member regularly comes to work late, the Manager starts the conversation by saying he/she wants to discuss the staff member’s slack attitude then the conversation is easily escalated because the manager is assuming the reason for lateness is because of a slack attitude. ![]() The problem with this is that the conversation quickly turns towards debating the assumption rather than the issue itself. Despite our obvious similarities our differences are too numerous to mentionĪ common trait I find in new Managers is that they always seem to assume the intentions of a staff member before they have a difficult conversation. We all see the world through different eyes. ![]() Step three – don ’ t assume the other person ’ s intentions Take ownership of the areas of your life that you are not happy with and you will be surprised with the power that you possess to control your destiny. In the middle of my rant a friend said to me “Why do you allow these type of people in your life?” suddenly my focus changed and instead of blaming other people I realised that I had a share of the blame and the solution was completely within my control. I remember once after a break-up with a girlfriend I was moaning about her lack of honesty and integrity and how similar she was to my girlfriend before. You will be amazed how different the world looks if you take ownership of every aspect of your life and also incredibly empowering. The brutal truth about life is that if you are not happy with a situation then the only person who can remedy that situation is yourself. Take ownership of the areas of your life that you are not happy with and you will be surprised with the power that you possess to control your own destiny. There is only way to guarantee a bad outcome and that is to continue to avoid the conversation. People are usually afraid to have these conversations because they imagin the worst possible outcome. I don’t want to upset them, but the undeniable truth is that the real reason why you are not having the conversation is a purely selfish one. It is not unusual that the rationalisation revolves around the other person e.g. ![]() Many people find themselves in a situation that they go to great lengths to rationalise the reason why they are not having that difficult situation. When you ask yourself why you are not having that difficult conversation the chances are you are lying to yourself. ![]() If you lie to people you lose your friends yet if you lie to yourself you lose any chance of meeting the person you were meant to become. The best way to approach this is to follow five simple steps. The biggest problem is that people find it difficult to fully understand that other people may see the world in a different way to themselves and what we see as a problem other people may see as something insignificant. Are we going to make things worse? Until we get to the stage that the moment has passed and now it feels too late to raise the issue. We are worried about how the person is going to react. While we are building up the courage to discuss the matter the issue is also building inside us. We know that something has to be said, whether it’s a staff member consistently coming in late or your partner is annoying you.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |